Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Like a baby deer


I miss anonymity. In this place, I am strange. A likable strange, certainly, but so abnormal that I cannot go anywhere without being bombarded by comments. "White girl!" "Where you from?" "I want to be your friend. Can I get your line?" "Take me to America with you." "I love you." I am tired of being noticed, studied, watched. I want to sit under a tree, look up at the hills, and not feel staring eyes.

When I was young I played softball, and my mom used to say I looked like a baby deer running the bases. Legs too long, awkward, likely to slip and fall at any moment.

That is how I feel here. Like everyone is watching as I walk around awkwardly, just about to fall.

4 comments:

kimberlee said...

You seem sad Linds. You're amazing and I love you so much. You and David are right where you're supposed to be. Loves to you both. <333

Meg said...

I love this. Wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry though ;) I love you white girl

Emily Greene said...

Great entry. We understand so well. Check out the last paragraph of this entry from an EMI friend of ours - we got a kick out of it:

http://ugandawater.blogspot.com/2010/03/hiring-practices.html

Alt-ternative Universe said...

Lindsay, we soooo understand. It can be really hard. Maggee struggles w/ it alot & trying to help her deal w/ it is hard, when as the parents you feel the same way. BTW, my favorite is this one, "Hey, Aminata!" What, that isn't my name, reply, "Hey, Fred!" LOL!